your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
love makes seman taste better
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
