it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
