going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
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