We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Come on in and take your pants off
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