Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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