My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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