is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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