I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
