I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Randomize
