my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
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