i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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