he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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