Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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