The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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