People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
