Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
