Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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