On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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