i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
