Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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