brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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