he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Randomize
