You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
