she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
