I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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