hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
