No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
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