oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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