Tell her she can't have a vagina
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
