so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
