I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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