You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
i believe in u and ur pee
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