ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
