ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Randomize
