You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Randomize
