Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize