I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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