i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
