Just fell off a train. Bad.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize