How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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