We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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