"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
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