I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
