So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
My boob is missing a layer of skin
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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