ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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