She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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