Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
