WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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