i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
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