would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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